I Am Angry at Anne Hathaway

This Gucci Spring 2011 dress is STUNNING but why, Anne, did you have to do geek chic with THIS dress of ALL dresses?

“And oh, gee, are these old things still here? I was so caught up in doing the crossword and reading charmingly intellectual books about, like, British people and vegetables and whatnot, that I completely forgot to take off my glasses! Honest mistake! It has NOTHING to do with me being worried that hosting the Oscars next to a human fart would taint my reputation.



“But, you know, in case you missed it: I could tutor you in math! Diagram sentences with your daughter, because come on, you totally don’t remember how to do that! I can give you uncomfortable but medically honest sex advice, speak to you in Binary, and rearrange your home library based on the Dewey Decimal System! In short, I am TOTALLY too busy being a brainy supergirl to hang out with James Franco on a daily basis! Because if I did, wouldn’t my IQ be too diminished for me to teach you the metric system… IN FRENCH? I MEAN RIGHT.”